May, 2004
First Time Camper?
Set The Stage For a Supper Summer Camp Experience
by Lynn Slaughter
Thinking of sending your child to summer camp for the first time? The good news is that there are choices galore. According to the American Camping Association, there are more than 12,000 day and resident camps in the United States geared to a variety of interests, abilities, ages, budgets, and schedules.
How do you figure out a good match for your child? For very young children, or children who are uncomfortable with sleep overs and being away from home, your best bet may be a day camp, so your child can return to the comfort and reassurance of home base each night.
Like residential camps, day camps come in a variety of shapes and sizes. They range in length of sessions from one week to several weeks and may be highly religious, secular, or somewhere in-between in their orientation. Many offer a variety of activities such as swimming, arts and crafts, sports, and music. Others are specialty camps, geared to children who are strongly interested in a particular sport or activity such as basketball, drama, music, or computers. Still others are special needs camps in which children facing similar challenges, ranging from cancer to arthritis to ADHD, can befriend and support one another while having fun.
Nancy Diamond, President of Niche Directories, which includes the online camp resource directory, www.kidscamps.com, says that day camp can be a terrific warm up experience for overnight camp. She notes that a number of rookie camps have emerged, in which a child attends a day camp and has the option of attending a five day or one week overnight session, usually at the end of the day camp session.
While day camps can afford kids wonderful opportunities to have fun, socialize, and develop skills, many camping experts believe that attending an overnight camp offers kids unique opportunities to grow and develop because they're away from home. According to Jack Dowell, President of the Heart of the South Section of the American Camping Association and Owner-Director of Camp Bear Track, "Residential camp involves creating a new life memory living away from parents with a whole new group of people. Kids get a respite from whatever is going on at home and school to immerse themselves in a whole other world." The experience makes an indelible impact, says Dowell, and helps build maturity, self-reliance, confidence, and self-esteem. One of his favorite statements by a camper is: "I loved being able to do something my parents didn't think I could do."
In fact, the chance to be in a community where no one has any preconceived notions about them is part of what makes the experience so special. In Summer Fun, Marian Edelman Borden quotes a camper who explains: "Because I didn't know anyone at the camp before I went, I felt a kind of freedom that I don't feel at home. Since no one knew me, I could try out for the camp play- even though back home I never participate in the school plays. In school, everyone thinks I'm a jock."
Each child is unique, and your child may or may not be ready for overnight camp. As Wanda DeWaard, Section Executive of the American Camping Association's Heart of the South region, explains: "I've known 11-year-olds who are unable to stay away from home, and 7 -year-olds who are ready."
To determine readiness, it's best to take your cue from your child. Does he express interest in going to camp? Is he comfortable doing sleep overs and being away from home for the night?
It goes without saying that parents are the ones who ultimately make the decision about where, when, and for how long their children attend camp. It's vital to set some parameters. How far away from home are you willing and/or able to send your child? For how long? Do you prefer a religious or secular camp? Keeping in mind that 55 percent of all camps offer some financial assistance, and extended family members and other community organizations may be willing to help, what is your price range?
Beyond these basic parameters, experts recommend giving your child as much input as possible into the selection process. Insisting that your child attend the camp you attended, or the one you're sure will improve her skills in a particular area, can be an invitation to disaster. During the years I taught at a performing arts camp, the most miserable campers I encountered were invariably the ones who felt their parents had forced them to sign on for eight weeks of non-stop art!
As Diamond points out, "The key question has to be, 'Where would my child
flourish?' Parents need to step aside from what they might want as a camp for
themselves, and think about what would enable their child to grow. Whereas I
might love a traditional camp with lots of outdoor activities, my daughter might
flourish at a computer camp."
When it comes to specialty camps, the input of children is particularly important.
One of my sons was a die-hard baseball player who relished his two weeks of
non-stop ball-playing at a baseball camp. However, some kids burn out. As Borden
points out: "Playing any sport (or computers or musical instrument) for
10 to 12 hours a day- unless you love the activity- will kill any burgeoning
interest faster than the speed of lightening."
In addition to your child's interests, it's important to consider how much
structure she's comfortable with. Highly structured camps schedule all activities
ahead of time, and campers have no options. This works well for some kids, and
not for others. As a staunch bookworm, I remember hating the summer camp I attended
because every minute of the day was scheduled for us, and we had no time to
read!
Other camps offer almost complete freedom of choice of activities, and many
offer a mix of required and optional activities. Your child's preferences, personality,
and learning style will determine what kind of structure works best.
Friends, relatives, or neighbors may have recommendations based on their camp experiences. If you're looking for a religious camp, talk with your clergy and find out if your church organization sponsors any camps, or knows of a related religious organization that runs a camp. Your local Y, Scouts, Camp Fire Boys and Girls, the school system, or recreation department may also sponsor camps. For a specialty camp, your child's coach, visual or performing arts teacher, or expert in the field may have some recommendations.
Camp fairs, which take place in many locations around the country, are a great place to pick up literature, talk to staff, and ask questions. These are usually advertised in newspapers, magazines, and other local media.
In addition, annually updated guides such as the American Camping Association's Guide to ACA-Accredited Camps and Peterson's Summer Opportunities for Kids and Teenagers are terrific resources, as is the Internet. Increasing numbers of parents and kids are researching camps online. There are a number of excellent online resource directories. For example, the American Camping Association (ACA) has a comprehensive database where you can search for accredited camps by 6 activity/focus, special needs, affiliation/cultural focus, and location. My search for Christian camps on their web site (www.acacamps.org) revealed 494 accredited possibilities nationwide, including ten in Tennessee.
While there are fine camps which are not accredited, many camping experts advise starting your search with ACA- accredited camps. To be accredited by the ACA, a camp must meet over 300 standards with respect to safety, child care, living space, food service, and medical care. Accreditation means that many of a parent's questions about safety and quality have already been answered. As DeWaard cautions, "Just because it's called a camp, don't assume that someone has checked it out, or that they have a health permit or any sort of accreditation. Every state is different. Some states have no legislation that covers camps, and others require permits. It's so important for parents to ask."
Once you've come up with a short list of camps to consider, the next step is collecting as much information as possible. Check to see if the camps have web sites. Send away for camp brochures and promotional videos. If possible, visit in person. A personal visit gives you an opportunity to meet staff face-to-face, see the facilities firsthand, and helps all family members increase their comfort level with the prospect of being separated.
Whether or not a personal visit is feasible, it's vital to talk directly with the camp director. In addition to inquiring about the camp's accreditation and safety record, it's important for parents to ask:
--What is the camp's philosophy and culture like? Some camps, for example,
emphasize competition as a valuable learning experience, while others prefer
focusing on non-competitive or creative activities.
--What is the director's background, training, and experience?
--How long has the camp been in existence? If a camp has been around for along
time, says Dowell, "chances are that they're doing something right."
--How is the staff recruited? What are their backgrounds and training?
--What percentage of staff members are former campers? returning staff members?
And what percentage of campers return? High percentages are obviously a sign
of experienced and enthusiastic staff, as well as satisfied campers. At Camp
Bear Track, for example, Owner-Director Jack Dowell notes with pride that he
has a 75 percent returning percentage for counselors and a 65 percent return
for campers.
--What is the counselor-to-camper ratio? For overnight camp, the American Camping
Association recommends one counselor for every six campers ages 7 and 8; one
for every eight campers for ages 9-14, and one for every ten campers between
15 and 17.
--What activities are offered?
--How structured is the program? What's a typical day like? --How is discipline
handled?
--How does the camp handle homesickness?
--What about the food? As Dowell notes, food is a big issue for kids: "We've
had kids who chose our camp because they knew we had hamburgers twice a week!"
--What are the living quarters like? Where are the bathrooms located? What about
the other facilities and equipment?
Be sure to ask for references, the names of parents and kids who attended the camp and who would be willing to talk with you (and your child) about their experiences.
Either before the camp or when you deliver your child, let the staff know about any special concerns or needs. For example, a common concern is bed-wetting, with many kids continuing to have accidents until they are ten or eleven, or even older. If they're given a heads up, camp staff are trained in how to discreetly deal with accidents in a way that minimizes embarrassment to the camper. On the home front, involve your child as much as possible in preparations for camp, such as shopping and labeling absolutely EVERYTHING your camper plans to take. Encourage your camper to pack a special possession from home, such as a stuffed animal or family photo, for comfort and reassurance. Be sure to include pre-addressed stamped envelopes and note paper for writing home as well. You may also want to read some books together about going to overnight camp.
Above all, it's important to remain positive and upbeat about the experience. While it's natural to have some ambivalent feelings, it's so important not to burden kids with our own anxieties. Instead, seek comfort and counsel from the other caring adults in your life. Talking with veteran parents of campers can be especially helpful.
Telling your child: "I'll miss you, but I'm really excited that you're getting to have this great experience" is helpful. A statement such as: "I won't know what to do with myself while you're gone" is not. Now your kid is not only worried about how he's going to cope, but whether you'll be able to manage!
Above all, experts caution parents to avoid making the "pickup promise." This is a setup for failure, warns Dowell: "The minute you say to a child, 'If you don't like it, we'll come get you,' you've got your kid thinking, "I'm not going to like it, so Mom will come and get me."' Instead, it's important to reassure your child that having some anxious or homesick feelings is natural, but that you have confidence in his or her ability to handle the challenge.
Homesickness, of course, is normal. Research indicates that 95 percent of kids who go to camp experience some homesick feelings. Doubts about being there are not uncommon during the first few days, and it's important not to panic. The first time one of my friends sent her child to camp, he wrote: "Dear Mom and Dad- I hate it. You're wasting your money. Come and get me." My friend spoke with the camp director and resisted the urge to jump into her car and rescue her son. Within days, her child had settled in. He ended up loving camp and returned for several summers.
Homesickness can hit hard in the first night or two at camp. It helps if you've written letters beforehand and prepared care packages (check with your camp on what's allowed) that your camper can receive immediately. If possible, write every day. Keep your letters newsy and upbeat. Your child may also have access to e-mail at camp, so be sure to check.
Keep the communications coming, even if your child doesn't write you back. His silence probably means he's having too good a time to respond, but rest assured that your letters and care packages will mean a lot. At the camp I've worked at for the last several summers, mail delivery is one of the major highlights of each day! Some camps also download photos of each day's activities onto their web site, so you may be able to get a reassuring glimpse of what your child is up to.
The decision to send your child to camp for the first time is a big one. You'll undoubtedly miss your child lot, and he'll miss you. But the benefits can be enormous. Camp is a gift that can open up a whole new world to your child beyond his neighborhood. It offers a unique opportunity to grow both individually and in community with other kids and caring adults.
Wanda DeWaard, Section Executive
Heart of the South Section
American Camping Association
4132 Rocky Branch Road
Walland, TN 37886
Phone: 865-379-5187 or 888-829-2267
E-mail: ACAHeartoftheSouth@ACAcamps.org
The American Camping Association
www .acacamps.org
Features many useful articles on camp experience for parents and kids, as well
as a comprehensive database where can search for accredited camps of various
types and locations. Organization publishes annually updated Guide to ACA-Accredited
Camps.
National Camp Association
www .summercamp.org
This site offers a free referral service. It contacts you with 4-8 recommendations
based on your preferences.
www.kidscamps.com
This is an online resource directory with a searchable database that divides
camps by specialty , such as sports, art, study abroad, special needs, etc.
www.petersons.com
This site has a summer opportunities section where you can search for camps
and other summer programs by activities, location, sponsor, and category such
as special needs or residential programs. Peterson's also publishes an annually
updated Summer Opportunities for Kids and Teenagers.
The Summer Camp Handbook, Everything You Need to Find, Choose, and Get Ready for Overnight Camp-- and Skip the Homesickness by Christopher A. Thurber, Ph.D. and Jon C. Malinowski, Ph.D. Los Angeles: Perspective Publishing, 2000.
Summer Fun. The Parent's Complete Guide to Day Camps. Specialty Camps.
and Teen Tours by Marian Edeleman Borden. New York: Facts on File, Inc.,
1999.